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From OAK // Thriving in LA
I've had a hilarious* amount of peanut butter today. *to clarify not a hilariously tiny amount
Real housewives of Salt Lake City? Sure! Whatever! Anything for one more second away from my stupid little thoughts!
A beautiful and necessary thread. ❤️
this isn't really what twitter is for, but ten years ago today my son died and I basically never talk about it with anyone other than my wife. it's taken me ten years to realize that I want to talk about it all the time. this is about grief
Love when you start a mediocre movie on the plane and can’t finish it and then you’re like sorry honey I know I havent seen you in two weeks but I need to watch the last 22 mins of Den of Thieves.
I sold a show. It’s about sex. 😈https://deadline.com/2019/11/quibi-dating-app-comedy-unmatched-allen-strickland-williams-1202789064/
Children are so precious. A mom on the plane gave her coat to her son to keep him warm, and then I watched him wipe between 10 and 27 boogers on it. The ones he didn’t eat.
this man’s shelves are empty and he needs a shower curtain
Makeup is men's darkest secret — here's what they're using https://trib.al/Fhd2jR4
Wishing my good friend, @Danny DeVito a happy birthday today 🎉
I like arrogance but only when it’s masking crippling insecurity.
yeah a gateway to go fuck yourself
Biden says he won't legalize marijuana because it may be a "gateway drug" http://hill.cm/oxttxtA
If you want to see a baby poke himself in the eye, say “where’s your eye”
I have been introduced to #FlirtyDancing—a blind date show where two people learn a dance separately and then must perform it upon meeting each other—and now I’m RUINED.